I give up on my life.?

jus had a baby boy 3wks ago, got a 20mth old daughter, and engaged, and just brought a new house.I am 27yrs old and a nurse. i have no friends, well, people who talk to me accionally. i have no family nearby, parents are deceased. i live in leeds, closest friends live in london.i feel ugly and useless. ic an't drive or swim. i'm pale, live in rags. don't know how to dress. i look plain and boring. don't want to get married, cus i don't think anyone from my side will turn up or friends. my friends are always too busy. i don't like , never have done. just do it to keep my man happy. hate men and women. women are so pretty and confident. i'm quiet and no one can be bothered with me. tried making friends but i always make the effort and everyone has there own friends. i'm a crap mother. haven't socialised for a longtime. my fiance mother always critises how i look after the kids.